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Beating or spanking?

On twitter today one of my followers posed the issue of child abuse. At first I was not sure why but then I started seeing other tweets about Child Abuse Judge stepping down after video. So me being me I goggled “child abuse judge” and the story immediately popped up about Judge William Adams. Adams was a Judge in Texas who recently stepped down two weeks ago after a video circulated of him “beating” his daughter.

I read over the story and searched for the video. Though the video was taped in 2004, to know that behind closed doors a man who made decisions on others that abused children was doing the same thing angers me on so many levels!

After viewing the 8 minute video, especially with knowing he was/is a Child Abuse Judge, my heart dropped! I almost felt like he got enjoyment out of this. When her mom came in just by the way she was talking I could tell that she was brainwashed or physically/mentally abused by him. At a point she (the mother) seemed scared as if he was going to turn around and beat her with the belt. “Pleading” with how she agreed with him and she told her, Hilary, not to do it and it was the girls choice not hers….

“Judge” William Adams to his Daughter while “beating” her with a belt:

1:20- “Bend over the fucking bed damnit”

1:43- “Lay down or I’ll spank you in your fucking face”

The mother took the belt and told her daughter to lay on her stomach and also hit her with the belt. She wouldn’t give the belt back to William (at this point I felt like she was trying to “protect” her daughter, hoping he would just back down if she stepped in). He leaves to get another belt, when he comes back:

3:06- “I never got my lick in on her. Get on your fucking stomach.

3:29- “I’m going to beat you into submission”

4:50- “I ought to keep beating you”

5:29- “If you even look at me fucking wrong I’m gonna take you in there and ware your fucking ass out with this belt.”

The girl getting beaten in the video is his, then 16 years old, daughter Hilary Adams. Apparently this was going on for a while but it was not until now she decided to speak out about it.

A portion of the CNN article

“Waiting this long to publish it has enabled me to look at it with hindsight and not be so caught up in the passion of the moment,” Hillary Adams said. “I think we do, my mother and I, we do need to try to move on past the anger and just concentrate on getting counseling and help.”
Receiving an outpouring of support after posting the video has been like a form of therapy, she told KRIS, which is based in Corpus Christi, Texas.

“People are believing us now, instead of calling us liars like they have in the past,” she said.

Reading over the CNN Article Williams doesnt see that what he did was a big deal. He says that he lost his temper because she stole the car but in the video you can hear that this particular beating was pertaining to a computer. Just with the contradiction we can see that this has been an ongoing matter.

A quote from Williams taken from the CNN Article:

“She’s mad because I’ve ordered her to bring the car back, in a nutshell, but yeah, that’s me. I lost my temper,” Adams told the TV station. “Her mother was there, she wasn’t hurt … it was a long time ago … I really don’t want to get into this right now because as you can see my life’s been made very difficult over this child.”

Adams continued: “In my mind I have not done anything wrong other than discipline my child when she was caught stealing. I did lose my temper, I’ve apologized. It looks worse than it is.”

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There is a difference between abuse and spankings… a huge difference!

To me abuse in when you act inferior toward your child (or spouse, mom, brother…etc) with your fist, hand, leg, head, mouth or an object to get to them to submit or obey you. Abuse comes in so many forms that sometimes people dont realized when they are being abused. The most identifiable is physical but emotional and mental have the same effects and maybe even worse.

Spanking my be a slap to the hand or behind when the child has done something wrong.

What we also have to understand, depending on what era you grew up in, a spanking was the most effective way to teach the rights and wrongs…and it worked. But with times changing we have to find more “delicate’ or appropriate ways to reach to our children. Cursing and beating them is not the answer.

Honestly I have gotten one spanking in my 25 years of existence. I personally dont see the reasoning for “beating” your child with an object as a means of discipline. However I do believe in slapping hands and pinching as a tool when kids are in the phase of touching everything.

In the video William uses the word spanking a lot… Was he spanking or beating his daughter?

View the video via YouTube


11/1/11

sigh* in exactly 2 months it will be a new year. I must say that this year FLEW by, it seems as we get older the time just seems to fly.

Its a new day. New Month. New goals. New accomplishments! My main goal for this month is to lose some (a lot) of weight! I am trying to find a diet that will fit me! So right now I am just incorporating a lot more fruit, veggies, and water into my diet. I have to get my mind together and get up in the morning and hit the gym!!! It will be a challenge but it will and can be done.

I want to lose weight for ME! And that’s something to remember. If you are happy with yourself, and your health is up to par, dont do ANYTHING anyone else wants or think you should do! Trying to please everyone else will leave you lifeless. People look at me and say “You dont need to lose weight” but I am not use to this weight so it seems like its too much. However I do have a love/hate relationship with it..lol.

Some other goals for this month….. I cant share because they are business related and personal! Key of advice: Everyone doesnt need to know everything. Most things are fine kept between you and yourself! But no worries once the goal is complete I will be sharing you all!

Did you make any wishes today??

In the music world Wale’s Ambition album came out. I have not fully listened to it but I am truly proud of him. It seems that the area he comes from are the main ones constantly trying to pull him/down! Being from the DMV I can see what this area lacks.. support! I am not saying go out an buy every album, if you don’t genuinely like his music, but kill the negativity! There’s so much talent in the area but before we congratulate someone for making it we throw stones because we didn’t have the balls to do it!

I am trying to get the link for Trey Songsz… heard some good stuff about Anticipation II!!!!!!!!!!


Breast Cancer Awareness…. (Around the world)… A story through pictures…

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30 Day Challenge: Exercise Regiment/Diet

Like I told you before I am committing myself to 30 days of something every month! This month its find an exercise regiment and cook more/diet!

I don’t plan on working out for 30 days straight (yikes!) my schedule right now is so hectic I don’t think I could find the time… (but I do want to try that!). I just want to get these pounds off of me and get healthier before the new year. 2012 is looking very promising and I want to go in with a Fresh Fit Healthy Me!

Soooo legoooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What’s your 30 day challenge???

PS.. I will share with you guys in a few days 🙂

 


October 1!

Well ladies and gents it’s that time again! The first of the month! You know the what that means…. NEW goals. NEW achievements. NEW accomplishments. a NEW YOU!

Take every opportunity to start fresh!

October:

Breast Cancer Awareness Month

Halloween

Fall fashions

Fresh cool crisp air!

I hope all of you are ready… because I am!


September One…

So today is the first day of September.. you know what that means…

NEW GOALS! NEW PLANS! NEW ACCOMPLISHMENTS!

This month is a wonderful month for many reasons.. My Four fav Virgos Birthdays are this month (Brittney, Shelley, & Beyonce..lol & Amy Winehouse). My cousin will be adding a new baby boy in to the family. This month (on the 23rd) will begin my favorite season.. FALL..

I feel like there will be plenty of great opportunities happening this month and many changes (for the better!) I am uber excited to see what this month has to offer. So as I do Every first of the month I will be going home to write out my goals for the month (yes I should have had them done yesterday but I worked over 12 hrs yesterday.. I was beat!)

So what do you look forward to this month??


August ONE!

Well folks.. it’s that time again! Time to restart & refresh! New Month.. New Goals.. New Accomplishments… & NEW YOU! It’s NEVER too late to start Fresh..

Its MONDAY… For some its the beginning of the week so start your week and new month off RIGHT!

After work… go home and write down all the things you want to accomplish this month. Look over all your goals you set for the summer.. How many did you scratch off the list? How many are spilling over to fall? How many just need to be thrown away and forgotten about? Don’t down yourself and if you find that your goals to accomplish list is outweighing your goals accomplished… just RE-EVALUATE! What needs to change so you can get some balance? Are these long-term goals? Am you READY to tackle such accomplishments? There’s a reason you just have to figure it out!

Have a great day folks! 🙂


Favorite Summer Things….

1. Beach
2. Dresses
3. Sandals
4. cookouts
5. long days
 
What are your top five favorite things about summer?
 


First day of Summer!

Though judging by the weather we havent been able to tell  what season  we are actually in but today IS the first day of summer!
 
I know that although we are all adults this is that time of year we all look forward to. Summer I just think Beach and Travel!
 
How do you plan on spending your summer doing? Are there goals you need to accomplish? Places you want to visit?
 
Its a new season.. start it off right!


Special Reminder for the ladies…

“LADIES: Close your legs and open your mind. Value what you have to offer and only offer it to the individual who has earned it.”
-@TheNotebook

Its 2011….sex still sells and we think it conquers all. It truly saddens me when I hear women talk about how they had sex which such & such and its ok because men do it, its just a double standard. YES it is a double standard that, its ok for a man to have sex with millions of women but if a woman has x number of sexual partners she’s a hoe.

But I’m not looking at it from that stand point.

We want more from a relationship. We want to find true love. We want respect….but having sex with just anyone is hypocritical of those desires. How is having sex with every person you meet going to guide to love? Respect? A healthy relationship? There is nothing wrong with “having fun” but there are boundaries that need to be built and never crossed.

Take time and energy to FIND and PLEASE YOU!

Use your body as a temple….not a tool.